I was feeling pretty content with myself as I cruised down the four lane highway. It had been a pretty good day overall. I had arranged a late afternoon meeting with a client to measure up a project for him and after that I met my wife for a “date” at a local pizza joint in an adjoining town. She had dropped our youngest daughter and some friends off at the movies in this same town and then we went out to eat. It was fun to do this occasionally and it kept our marriage of over twenty five years fresh as I still enjoy her company as much as she still seemed to enjoy mine.

After eating, I dropped her back at her car and headed out of the theater parking lot. As I rolled onto the street I suddenly had this craving for a milkshake. Well, it wasn’t exactly sudden. It had started to manifest itself after we had finished eating. It mostly had to do with the fact that my brain was aware of a “Steak & Shake” restaurant which made some of the most delicious handmade shakes around and happened to be situated down the street from the movie theater. I succumbed to my urge and wheeled into the drive through to satisfy this craving. Once the order was fulfilled I headed out onto the four lane and headed East bound toward home. It was about a twenty-five minute drive home which allowed me plenty of time to enjoy my shake. Darkness was just settling in as I eased from the on ramp onto the four lane.

After finishing my treat, which didn’t take long, I started to get bored. As I often did I pulled out my phone and may have been surfing social media. Before you get all bent out of shape please realize that I do not recommend this as it can be unsafe. As they say, do as I say not as I do. But I felt that I had complete control of the situation and may have looked to see what my FB peeps were up to. I never at any time drove in a manner that I felt could be construed as erratic in my mind. This may have went on for a few minutes but then I became bored with that and set my mind to the task of getting home.

After driving for a few more minutes I was approaching a stop light which was in a town about four miles from my home. As I approached the light I saw a car in the right lane ahead of me that had stopped for the red light. Just as I began to slow down the light turned green. Not wanting to slow down to allow the car ahead of me to get back up to speed I looked in my side view mirror and after establishing it was clear steered left and passed the slowly accelerating car. Once clear of the slower car I eased back into the right hand lane and proceeded East.

It was at this moment noticed that I noticed a set of headlights fall in behind me as he cleared the intersection. There was nothing that unusual about that so I never gave it a second thought. It was at that moment when everything changed. The darkness suddenly was alight with flashes of red and blue which were emanating from atop the vehicle behind me. It was then that I realized that I was for some reason being pulled over. Before I started slowing down my eyes quickly looked down at the speedometer to establish how fast I might be going as I had a habit of driving slightly above the posted limits. Sure enough I was speeding along at about sixty to sixty five miles per hour which was about five to ten miles per hour above the posted limit.

I eased over to the shoulder, placed the truck in park, retrieved my wallet so that it was easily accessible, placed my hands at ten and two on the steering wheel so that they would be clearly visible to the approaching officer, and then I waited. Within seconds I saw the officer exit his car with flashlight in hand and approach the vehicle. Even though I had just been pulled over for what I assumed was speeding, I felt unusually calm and at peace with myself and was ready to take whatever financial punishment the Officer or legal system felt was justified.

The conversation went something like this. “Good evening sir, do you know why I pulled you over?” asked the Officer. “I would assume that it was because I was speeding.” I answered. It was then that the Officer started stammering as if though he had been thrown a fastball when he was expecting a curve. I had found from past experience with law enforcement that being truthful went a long way when one gets pulled over and in the past it had helped me gain leniency with said law enforcement. Somewhat stammering, the Officer replied “I guess the speed limit is fifty-five but that’s not why I pulled you over.” I mentally slapped myself on the side of the head, I was never any good at giving the appropriate answers to these questions and always seemed to provide more info than was required! “Back at the intersection you made an unsafe lane change by switching lanes without signalling.” stated the officer. “I believe you are correct Sir.” I replied with another fastball down the middle. “The main reason I pulled you over is that we received a report that a truck matching your description was driving erratically. What have you been up to this evening Sir?” questioned the Officer. I calmly explained to him about measuring the job, meeting my Wife for supper and how I was heading home. “Did you have anything to drink this evening with your meal?” questioned the Officer, obviously referring to alcoholic beverages. I replied that I had not. “Have you had anything to drink at all today?” asked the Officer. Again I replied in the negative. After procuring the required documents from me the Officer retreated to his car where the I assumed he was going to write up the tickets I had just earned.

As I sat in my truck I still felt oddly at peace with the myself and still didn’t have that knot of dread or irritation with myself in my stomach which so many times accompanied situations such as this. Normally I would get fidgety and start messing with the radio or the phone but this time I simply sat there and looked around the cab and my surroundings as I waited the Officer’s return. It was as I looked around that I noticed something odd on the floorboard of the passengers side. It appeared to be a flashlight beam that was flitting to and fro across the floorboard. My eyes followed it to its source at the door post of his truck. The light was being projected from a flashlight being held in the hand of another Officer who apparently was keeping an eye on the me to make sure I wasn’t doing anything that might be construed as shady. While I completely understood why they needed to do this it caught me completely off guard and raised my anxiety level slightly. Was I ever so glad that I hadn’t started digging through anything and acting suspiciously to the point where they felt the need to subdue me in some manner.

It was at this moment the original Officer returned. He did not, however, have any papers in his hand. What he did have was a small, square box about two inches square and a small white plastic tube. He spoke, “Sir, due to the nature of the call we received I am going to have to do a breathalyzer test on you.” Since I had not been drinking I had no problem with taking the test and in fact was beginning to find the whole thing very amusing. After being instructed on the proper way to blow into the device I proceeded to blow as instructed. After I finished the Officer stated he would be right back. As he turned to leave I had to put my two cents in, “If that thing shows anything I am going to have a talk with “Steak and Shake” about their milkshakes.” The Officer chuckled, turned around and retreated to his car.

A few minutes later he returned to the car with what I could only assume would be a ticket for at least an unsafe lane change or speeding for which I had so easily confessed. All he handed him was my license and registration and a “verbal” warning to be more careful. I thanked him and continued home.

Later at home I was relaying the story to my Wife. It was obvious that she was not finding it as humorous as I did. She looked at me and with frustration in her voice began to vent, “Let me get this straight! They stopped you for a report that you were driving erratically, you voluntarily admitted to speeding, he had you for an unsafe lane change which you also didn’t deny and he gave you a Breathalyzer test for good measure and all you got was verbal warning! While I, on the other hand, was stopped on a local Main street, off the main highway, by a State Trooper and received a ticket for not wearing my seat belt!”

I replied dryly, “Yep, that pretty well sums it up.”