As he sat perched on the peak of the building, the man watched as his last wadded up sock rolled down the faux copper roof past his recently removed shoes only to quickly be escorted off the edge of the roof like a stray tumbleweed by the sun drenched breeze. It landed in the newly emerged grass seed and straw bedding which had in its own way contributed to the situation in which he now found himself.

The day had started off with such promise. The man had a plan. It was going to be a sunny and relatively warm day in the fall and he had a job which needed to be finished. His vocation in life was construction. He didn’t normally do the construction himself but he was responsible for bidding jobs and when awarded a job he was to see it through to its completion by sending crews to do his bidding. The site on which he found himself was one of those projects. Everything was done except a few minor items that he felt he could complete himself instead of sending a crew to do it. It would also give him time out of the office on a beautiful day.

He felt that he had planned ahead to the best of his abilities and brought enough supplies and tools to complete the job in a few hours. Little did he know as he drove to the job site that his best laid plans were about to be thrown a curve ball. As he approached the job site from the four lane highway he looked over to admire the building from a distance. The building, as mentioned earlier, had a faux painted copper metal roof which shined brilliantly in the fall sunshine. At least most of it shined except for a few spots toward the one end. The mans curiosity was peaked as to what was causing these blemishes. He thought to  himself that he would check that out once he arrived on site.

When he arrived on the job site he quickly ascertained the cause of the blemishes on the roof. The spots on the roof were clumps of finely chopped straw which had been deposited on the roof and had become caked on the roof when it came in contact with moisture. From reports given him by the groundskeeper he deduced that a landscaper that he had hired to work the disturbed earth and plant new grass around the building was the culprit. How might a landscaper be responsible for the blemishes you ask? After planting new grass seed in newly worked soil he used a machine to broadcast straw over the disturbed area to help retain moisture and discourage erosion. From the description of the aforementioned groundskeeper, instead of just depositing the straw on the ground it was a regular strawmageddon! Straw was deposited all over the roof and deposited in the gutters blocking drainage through the downspouts.

Not to be deterred the man came up with an ingenious plan. Using a borrowed cordless leaf blower he ascended a folding ladder that he had brought with him and carefully stepped onto the roof . The shiny roof caused him little fear of slipping on the surface because according to his mental calculations the pitch of the roof was minimal and the shoes he wore had soft and supple soles that he assured himself should be able to maintain sufficient traction. The man prided himself on the fact that due to his rather large feet and tall stocky frame he only bought high quality mail order shoes which came with quality soles that provided him good grip and kept his rather ample body secure as he meandered on metal roofs such as this.

He started with the gutters first. His landscaper had done him few favors in covering the roof and building with the fine straw. The landscaper had obviously not spared the bales as he covered everything with the golden flax. Since the roof was a smooth surface a majority of  the golden goodness had deposited itself a couple of inches deep in the gutter. It also plugged the downspout on one end thus denying water from the roof the chance of making an easy escape and causing the straw to be waterlogged. The man fired up his electric blower and inserted it into the gutter trough. Bits of fine water-logged straw began to fly through the air and out of the gutter. The man quickly realized that all may not be well. While the straw was indeed being evicted from the gutter it did not all fly over the edge and onto the ground. Some of it swirled up into the air and deposited itself on the smooth shiny roof. Even with his high quality soles they were no match for a newly moistened roof covered with the wet, slimy, golden flax. After almost slipping a few times he retreated up the roof to a dryer section to save himself the pain and embarrassment of sliding off the roof and being deposited on the earth below.

He decided to let the roof dry and attack the straw spots higher up. While the blower took the top layer of straw off the top it could not muster enough velocity to remove the thin layer of straw which was still stuck to the roof. He did discover that if he rubbed the spot lightly with the toes of his shoes it would easily come off. But it was difficult to use his shoe to get it completely clean so he came up with a brilliant idea to remove it. While he let the straw which had blown onto the roof  dry he finished up some odds and ends on the building at ground level and then went to a local discount store to purchase a dry dust mop.  This was the  kind with the braided loops that should easily remove the last vestiges of straw stuck to the roof  without damaging the paint.

Upon returning he mounted the ladder to make his way back onto the roof armed with his new cleaning tool. As he stepped onto the roof and headed up to the spots he noticed a thin layer of dust on the roof which was more pronounced by the angle the sun was hitting the roof. Making a mental note of this but not really concerned he headed for the spots. At first it went fairly well as the dry mop did the job as expected. As he moved from spot to spot he began to notice that his high quality shoes were beginning to lose their grip with the shiny surface of the roof. Looking back on the incident he realized that the fine dust which had noticed as he began his little jaunt up the roof  must have accumulated on the bottom of his shoes and began to lower the coefficient of friction between his shoes and the roof causing him to start sliding down the roof.

Being the close to the peak of the roof and being the quick thinker that he prided himself in being, he perched himself on the peak and reassessed this perilous situation. His mind began to run scenarios on how to remove himself from this sticky situation. He deduced that his stocking feet might have enough moisture in them from sweating that if he took his shoes off they might afford him the traction needed to extricate himself from the roof. So he removed his shoes and stood up on the roof. Apparently his socks did not afford the grip that he imagined. He began to slide down the roof even quicker than with the shoes on. He scrambled back up the to the peak with about as much grace as a crab trying to cross an ice covered lake.

Safely parking himself at the ridge he once more began to weigh his options. Maybe, he thought to himself, if I removed my socks the bare skin on the soles of my feet would give me the traction I needed. So off came the socks. He stood up feeling very proud of himself. It was at that moment he realized his miscalculation. The years of carrying his ample body around had produced hard callouses on the bottom of his feet. Instead of being soft and able to grip the roof his feet were more like old weathered leather which over time had dried out and had the consistency of hard shiny plastic. In other words the coefficient of friction had dropped and he had less traction than before. Once again he sat back down on the ridge and ponder his situation.

As he watched his one sock drop over the edge he decided to grab his shoes and put them back on his feet. At least with them he had some semblance of traction. While he still slipped some he was able to crab walk down to the edge of the roof and to the waiting ladder all the while thinking….I wish I had paid more attention in Physics class when the teacher discussed the coefficient of friction…………..